you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
