areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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