My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
