Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
