For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
