Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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