I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm just crazy horny about you
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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