She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
honey bunches of taint.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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