Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
