He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
