So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
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