I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
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