Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Naked Twister starts at high noon
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
