flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
