So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
third nipple confirmed
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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