Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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