I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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