where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
