so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Less talking, more tequila
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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