I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
