hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
