It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
