I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You ruined the universe
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
