it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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