i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
