You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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