I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
