so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
