somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
