just come out here and I will go home with you...
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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