She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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