How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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