He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
