there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I need to sanitize my soul.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
