I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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