apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
