fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
