just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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