He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
