So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
