Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
