Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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