I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Porn is love you can see.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
