Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
