I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
