She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I understand Curling. That high.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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