She said her name was "party"
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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