You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
