Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
