Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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